Jokes

[Julian Mayo]

Joe passed away. His will provided $30,000 for an elaborate funeral.

As the last guests departed the affair, his wife, Helen, turned to her
oldest friend. "Well, I'm sure Joe would be pleased," she said.

"I'm sure you're right," replied Jody, who lowered her voice and leaned
in close. "How much did this really cost?"

"All of it," said Helen. "Thirty thousand."

"No!" Jody exclaimed. "I mean, it was very nice, but $30,000?"

Helen answered. "The funeral was $6,500. I donated $500 to the
church.
The wake, food and drinks were another $500. The rest went for
the memorial stone."

Jody computed quickly. "$22,500 for a memorial stone? My God,
how big is it?"

"Two and a half carats."

I know Helen

[GhoGho]

I know Helen

I think we all do

[jacfan]

Hey what a nice way to remember her partner in life.

[Julian Mayo]

Hey what a nice way to remember her partner in life.

I have a far far better way

[<T-K>]

Hey what a nice way to remember her partner in life.

I have a far far better way

Uh oh...

[Julian Mayo]

Hey what a nice way to remember her partner in life.

I have a far far better way

Uh oh...

Would you like fries with that?

[<T-K>]

I have a far far better way

Uh oh...

Would you like fries with that?

Supersized?

[jacfan]

Fries and 2 carats please!!

[jacfan]

Hey what a nice way to remember her partner in life.

I have a far far better way

I would love to hear about it.

[Julian Mayo]

Fries and 2 carats please!!

And how would Madam like her Roo with that ? On a gold band?

[jacfan]

On a silver platter will do just fine thank you Julian. Oh and peel me a grape or two while you are there.
Still waiting for my massage

[Julian Mayo]

On a silver platter will do just fine thank you Julian. Oh and peel me a grape or two while you are there.
Still waiting for my massage

Turn left at the Hume. I am being held captive by three school children

[jacfan]

What about I send the "super nanny" to take care of ankle biters and teen.. then you fire up "Therapy" and head down the Hume.... bring grapes.. massage oil... and a big.. um... smile!!
I will be waiting for a decent massage.. my shoulders are very stiff and back is a bit sore after gym work.

[Julian Mayo]

What about I send the "super nanny" to take care of ankle biters and teen.. then you fire up "Therapy" and head down the Hume.... bring grapes.. massage oil... and a big.. um... smile!!
I will be waiting for a decent massage.. my shoulders are very stiff and back is a bit sore after gym work.

Supernanny would take one look and run
We were going fishing at 4am. There is a thirty knot wind and a twenty foot surf, so the rocks are out of bounds. The first fight started at 3:47am.
They are now lying in their beds, muttering darkly

[jacfan]

What about I send the "super nanny" to take care of ankle biters and teen.. then you fire up "Therapy" and head down the Hume.... bring grapes.. massage oil... and a big.. um... smile!!
I will be waiting for a decent massage.. my shoulders are very stiff and back is a bit sore after gym work.

Supernanny would take one look and run
We were going fishing at 4am. There is a thirty knot wind and a twenty foot surf, so the rocks are out of bounds. The first fight started at 3:47am.
They are now lying in their beds, muttering darkly

Hmmmm that is a tough one.... how about I send "super nanny" plus 3 X box.... a packet or three of some sort of sedative and then you just hop in "therapy" and you are on your way....
However I must insist.....DO NOT TAKE the medication yourself... this is for the kids...